Forgive me,Sorry…………………..THE POWER OF HO’OPONOPONO
“I just kept saying, ‘I’m sorry’ and ‘I love you’ over and over again. Turns out that loving yourself is the greatest way to improve yourself, and as you improve yourself, you improve your world.”
Ho’oponopono is an ancient Hawaiian practice that combines love, forgiveness, repentance, and gratitude in four powerful phrases when said reflecting to yourself. Yep, that’s it. Four simple phrases that heal the soul. They are:
I first heard of this spiritual phenomenon when reading an article about how a therapist in Hawaii, Dr. Len, cured an entire ward of criminally and mentally insane patients with this simple mantra. Dr. Len healed these patients without ever physically seeing them. He did it by sitting with himself, looking inward and repeating the Ho’oponopono with true heartfelt love.
“I just kept saying, ‘I’m sorry, ’ ‘please forgive me,’ thank you’and ‘‘I love you, over and over again. Turns out that loving yourself is the greatest way to improve yourself, and as you improve yourself, you improve your world. Whenever you want to improve anything in your life, there’s only one place to look: inside you.
And when you look, do it with love. After a few months, patients that had to be shackled were being allowed to walk freely. Others who had to be heavily medicated were getting off their medications. And those who had no chance of ever being released were being freed.”
THE QUICK AND FAST TRACK : Ho’oponopono HOW AND WHY WORK
The How: Take two deep breaths and close your eyes. Now envision either yourself or a person that created pain in your life. Really see them. Really feel the pain as if that image were real.
Now say: I love you, I’m sorry, Please forgive me, Thank you. Say each one with absolute conviction. True love, true apology, true forgiveness and true gratitude.
It will take multiple times saying it. Say it like a mantra. When you think the person (in your imagination) is ready to accept the Ho’oponopono, imagine them embracing you with a wave of angelic light and love that eventually merges you both into one. It makes me tear up even thinking about it now. It’s so beautiful when you put your heart into it.
The Why: The Ho’oponopono is based on the theory that we are all truly one energy. That is why this is one of the highest forms of self-love. You are reclaiming your energy through love and forgiveness. What a gift this is! It is believed that when you connect in this realm, you are actually connecting with a piece of the universal soul.
This means that you are truly saying these phrases to your own soul and/or to the person you imagined. Think of that when you are saying the Ho’oponopono.
It’s no surprise that people hurt each other daily. It’s an unfortunate part of human nature. I’m not saying it’s a good thing, nor that it is always done purposefully. More often than not, we end up hurting others without even knowing, without even intending. Yet, an I’m sorry is hardly ever said. Why is that?
When your words or actions have hurt someone else, saying “I’m sorry” is hard, regardless of the circumstances. It’s especially tough if you have some legitimate grievances too. You may even think the other person should be the one to apologize. But lives have been bruised and broken for just this unproductive rationalization.
If it were easy, it wouldn’t mean as much.
Saying “I’m sorry” can feel like you’re ripping your heart and soul open and leaving yourself exposed to pain and hurt from the other person. There’s no way to get around this, and there’s no way to guarantee that their response will be a satisfactory one. If you find this hard, you’re not alone.
Do it anyway.
Start with a few simple words: I’m sorry. I was wrong. Please forgive me.
The chance of it making a life-changing difference to both the other party and to you is far greater than the risk of a hurtful outcome. It’s unlikely you can hurt much more than you do already.
Making things right is far more important than being right. It is a mindset girded by love, and love must, in all things, be our shield and our guide.
These excuses—singly or in lethal combinations—have been stumbling blocks for me in the past when I needed to apologize to someone:
If you boil these down, they can all be summed up into two words: Fear and Pride. But scripture is clear about both of these emotions.
Baloney!. At best this is a dumb idea…at worst, a cruel lie.
This line came from a novel by Erich Segal called Love Story. The phrase was spoken twice in the film starring Ali MacGraw and Ryan O’Neal. The first time was when O’Neal’s character, Oliver, apologized to MacGraw’s character, Jennifer, for getting very angry. It was also spoken as the last line of the film by Oliver after his father says, “I’m sorry,” when he learned of Jennifer’s death.
To teach starry-eyed youngsters that love means you never have to say you’re sorry is nothing but a misguided hoax and romantic drivel. Anyone who’s been married very long knows this is about the dumbest statement they’ve ever heard. Love means you DO have to say you’re sorry when you’ve hurt someone.
The bold and direct approach is to ask for private time to address the other person. If they won’t let you do that, or you just can’t bring yourself to do that, a simple note of apology is a good way to start.
You don’t have to grovel. You don’t have to beg. Resist the temptation to make too many excuses. Listen to God’s Spirit inside you and ask for the right words…the simpler the better.
Sometimes you’ve waited so long, the other person has hardened themselves and will be more likely to resist accepting your apology. It’s still better for you to plant the seed than not, but you can avoid harder feelings by saying “I’m sorry” sooner.
Ask anyone who’s lost a loved one with whom they were estranged. They would give anything to have them back long enough to make amends. “At this stage of my life, I still regret the times I should have ”
And, of course, you could be the one to die before you’ve apologized. Do you really want to leave behind those unresolved emotions and risk the other person remembering you with hard feelings?
And don’t deceive yourself…when two people are at odds with each other, there’s always collateral damage. Almost invariably, someone else is in the middle…someone who loves both parties and is miserable because their loved ones can’t resolve their differences.
So please don’t wait — for your sake and for the sake of the other person. Waiting will only make it harder. And whatever happens, you’ll at least know you did what you needed to do.