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Many people are 100% gay or lesbian and are drawn sexually and emotionally only to partners of the same sex. Others are completely heterosexual, bonding in sexual and intimate relationships only with people of another sex.
But what about everybody else? A significant percentage of people do not fit neatly into either of these categories, because they experience sexual and emotional attractions and feelings for people of different genders at some point during their lives
. For lack of a better term, they are called bisexuals, although, many people prefer to call themselves “pansexual”, “non – preferential”, “sexually fluid”, “ambisexual” or “omnisexual”.
The 0 to 6 Kinsey scale was developed by sex researchers to describe sexual orientation as a continuum. Heterosexuals are at zero on the scale, gays and lesbians are at the other end of the scale at 6, and everyone between 1 and 5 is bisexual.
According to Kinsey, people who fall on scales 1 or 2 have predominantly heterosexual sexual and loving relationships and desires, but they also have attraction and experience with same-sex partners.
Those who score her 3 on the scale are almost equally attracted to men and women. People who rank 4 and 5 on the Kinsey scale mostly choose same-sex partners, but they also have heterosexual tendencies and relationships, rather than being fully gay or lesbian.
Emotional bisexuals: have intimate emotional relationships with both men and women, but only have sexual relationships with one gender.
Integrated bisexuals: have more than one primary relationship at the same time, one with a man and one with a woman.
Exploratory bisexuals: either straight or gay/lesbian, but have sex with another gender just to satisfy curiosity or “see what it’s like”.
Hedonistic bisexuals: primarily heterosexual but engage in gay or lesbian sex only when under the influence of drugs and / or alcohol.
Isolated bisexuals: 100% straight or gay / lesbian now but has previously had sexual experiences with another gender in the past.
Latent bisexuals: completely straight or gay lesbian in behaviour, but have strong desire for sex with another gender, but have never acted on it.
Motivational bisexuals:straight women who have sex with other women only because a male partner insists on it to titillate him.
Transitional bisexuals: temporarily identify as bisexual while in the process of moving from being straight to being gay or lesbian, or going from being gay or lesbian to being heterosexual.
Many of these people might not call themselves bisexual, but because they are attracted to and have relationships with both men and women, they are in fact bisexual.
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Many bisexual people complain that they feel like outsiders in both the straight and gay/lesbian worlds, and that they can`t fit in anywhere, feeling isolated and confused.
Studies have shown that bisexual people suffer from social isolation even more than gay men or lesbians because they lack any community where they can find acceptance and role models.
Many gay men feel that bisexual men are really gay, that they are just in denial about being gay, and that they should “just get over it.”
Many straight men are homophobic and hate and fear both bisexual and gay men, often victimising them with harassment and physical violence. Read more:
Telling your parents you are gay Many straight women reject bisexual men out of misguided fears that they have Aids and admonish them to “stop sitting on the fence and make up their minds”.
Bisexual women are often distrusted by lesbians for “sleeping with the enemy,” hanging onto heterosexual privileges through relationships with men and betraying their allegiance to women and feminism.
Heterosexual women often reject bisexual women out of fear that they will make sexual advances and attempt to “convert” to being bisexual.
Some researchers point out that being bisexual is somewhat similar to being biracial.
People of both races generally feel that they do not belong or belong to nowhere because their existence challenges the very notion of race. do not feel comfortable or accepted by Like bisexual people,
they spend most of their lives going back and forth between two communities that he doesn’t understand or accept.
Like biracial people, bisexual people have to struggle to invent their own identities to fit their experiences.
Forming a bisexual identity helps bisexual people structure, understand, and give meaning and definition to their reality. Stages of Bisexual Identity:
For most bisexuals, there are at least four steps or stages to fully acknowledging and becoming comfortable with their bisexual identity.
1. Confusion about sexual orientation. Most bisexual people are initially very confused about their attraction to people of both sexes, questioning their own reality and asking themselves, “What’s wrong with me?” .
Spend their entire lives at this stage, hiding their sexual orientation, feeling lonely, only with the inner turmoil of their “dual attraction.”
Many people go through life identifying as heterosexual or gay/lesbian in order to accept and understand their sexual orientation. We feel great external pressure to choose and identify with.
With no language to shape their own reality, and no visible role models or community at their disposal, bisexual people must develop enough confidence and belief in their identity to ultimately overcome this stage. must have.
3. For most bisexuals, coming out and being out of the closet is an ongoing process that must be repeated with each new social situation, job, friend, or lover.
We see it as the most important form of political action to create visible role models and a cohesive bisexual community.
Most bisexuals have endured the first three stages of her in silence and alone, so that other bisexuals have come to realize their sexual orientation without the years of internal conflict and loneliness.
We want to make it easier to accept Many also get involved in bisexual political organizations to raise awareness of bisexuality and promote bisexuality as a viable identity.
Just as gay men and lesbians can only gain some rights through struggle in the social and political sphere, bisexuals can get out of the closet and gain political and human rights only by developing political clout. acquire. what does that mean to you
Who Are Bisexuals As you can see, bisexuality has no simple definition and bisexual people are a very diverse group.
Some bisexual people are committed to monogamous long-term relationships, while others have multiple partners at once in various arrangements.
There are several theories about the model. Few have identified at least 13 types of bisexuality defined by JR sexual desire and experience. they are:
Alternating bisexuality: May have relationships with men, and after the relationship ends, may choose a female partner for the next relationship, and many then return to a male partner.
Bisexual: Primarily heterosexual, but chooses same-sex partners only in situations where other sexual partners are inaccessible. B. A prison, military, or segregated school.
Concurrent Bisexual: Having primary relationships with only one gender, but simultaneously having other casual or secondary relationships with people of another gender.
Conditionally Bisexual: If you are either straight or gay/lesbian but switch to a relationship with the opposite sex for financial or professional reasons or for specific purposes.
B. Young straight men who become gay prostitutes or lesbians who marry men for acceptance by their families and children
Literally millions of people are bisexual, but most of them keep their sexual orientation a secret, making bisexual people almost
invisible as a group in society. has long recognized the need to build communities and organize politically.
Over the years, hard work has resulted in significant progress in political and human rights, and a visibly prosperous gay population. and a lesbian community was born.
Bisexual people are much slower to come out of the closet, create communities, form political and social networks to gain recognition, and form political and social networks to gain recognition and political gain influence.
Many bisexual people have worked for gay and lesbian organizations for decades. In recent years, bisexuals have become more and more accepted as members of the gay/lesbian/bisexual/transgender community.
However, the rigid gay/straight dichotomy has left many bisexuals feeling marginalized and rejected by gay men and lesbian women, and in recent years many independent bisexual political and social groups have is appearing.
Both heterosexual and gay/lesbian communities seem to have only two possible models of him being bisexual, neither of which accurately represents bisexual people.
The first is the bisexual “transition model”, where all bisexuals are believed to be gay or lesbian in reality but are in the process of coming out as gay at some point.
Another is the “pathological model” that bisexuals are neurotic or mentally unstable because they are conflicted and indecisive to determine whether
they are straight or gay/lesbian. Both models see bisexuality as a transitory experience or “phase” that arises out of confusion rather than a genuine sexual orientation as valid as heterosexuality or homosexuality.
Some view bisexuality as inherently destructive because it blurs boundaries and exposes both straight and gay men and lesbian women to sexual ambiguity.
As a result, bisexuality challenges notions of sexuality, traditional relationships and family structures, monogamy, gender and identity. Bisexuals cannot conform to the ethics of the gay or heterosexual world.
Instead, you must reinvent your personal lifestyle and relationships to meet your own needs without having to follow someone else’s rules.
Nearly all bisexual people recognize that discovering the term “bisexual” is essential to understanding and accepting their sexual orientation.
]Most people are very relieved when they first hear the word “bisexual” because they finally get a word that reflects their own experiences and feelings.
For some, bisexuality is due to negative stereotypes such as “promiscuous,” “garden keeper,” neuroticism, or being an AIDS carrier, leading them to identify with a label or identify with themselves.
You can’t claim it’s a thing, but most people agree that it fits their description and comes closer to life than any other language.
Rather than reject the label, many bisexuals invent their own definition and create a bisexual lifestyle that fits their individual lives. 3. Acquiring and maintaining a bisexual identity.
For many bisexual people, this step is the most difficult. Intellectually, they are comfortable being bisexual, but emotionally, being bisexual in the real world is extremely conflicting.
Often despised by family and friends, and often rejected by spouses and potential partners for being bisexual, developing and maintaining a bisexual identity requires inner strength, self-confidence, self-confidence, and self-confidence.
I realize that I need independence. Many overcome these obstacles by creating their own communities, making friends and lovers, and staying out of the closet regardless of the consequences.
Check out one of the many bisexual and question support groups listed at the back of this booklet as a safe place to express your feelings and meet others going through similar experiences. please give me.
Individual counseling and therapy can also help you process your emotions and gain clarity and confidence. Be sure to consult a non-judgmental therapist who advocates for bisexuality and is familiar with bisexual issues.
Joining a bisexual social or political group is also a great way to see visible role models so that you can develop your bisexual identity in a way that works for you.
Finally, there are many excellent books on bisexuality that can help you understand and fully accept your sexual orientation.
Does any of this sound familiar? Do you struggle with conflicting feelings and confusion about your sexual orientation? Or are you ready to adopt a bisexual orientation?
Looking for a community to share your evolving identity with others? If yes, request support now
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