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The About Page Extended …….

Drug Epidemic Hit The Gay Community
September 22, 2017
The Tree: Childs Dream
September 22, 2017

EARLY 60's


Against my will my beloved mother finally gave a birth to me, I use the word finally because she went twice for abortion, it's not that she didn't want me but they could not afford another child, she had already two to feed the third will be a disaster, It was the early sixties and Greece was rebuilding its economy , my mother was terrified as she struggles to look after the two she had , but the Dr told her that she will be a "murderer " to the eyes of God so poor mum went back home only to return two weeks after according to my sister she had tears in her eyes, trying to explain to the Dr the finance problem, The Dr told her again, "murderer" so my mother decided not to be a murderer.

In a way, I wish she went through with the abortion because as a child I did not have an easy one If it wasn't for my sister looking after me whenever she was free I do not know what would have happened to me. My sister was there whenever I needed her, she became my mother, my friend and the best sister anyone can have.

She saved my life many times, she was there every time I was crying, she was there every time I needed someone to talk too, I couldn't understand my upbringing, I was confused until I realize I was Gay, till then my life was chaoticMy brother had his own problems , sometimes I was convinced that he was Ok with my father been alcoholic, beating my mother almost every night, he was never there to protect her, my sister was but as a woman she couldn't do a lot and I was a baby , but I made a promise to myself, When I become a man I will beat my father to death, in revenge for my mother and I became a man at the age of 16..

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All I recall from that night is a man saying to me "Please stop it you will end up in prison for the rest of your life and he does not worth it" with those words I stop and look down to see my father nearly bleeding , he covers his face and I was sure I heard him crying, begin me to stop and the words stuck in my head till today are " you are killing me please stop" I couldn't stop

Those 16 years beating my mother, he had to suffer for that, I told him " You should praise the woman who gave you 3 children and work hard to raise them, and what have you done to her every night? beating her You are not a man and you are not my father, I spit on his face and that was last I saw him.

That night I looked at my mothers face with pride I wanted to tell her, he will never beat her again she was safe, but I could not, as she looked at me with anger and somehow she felt weird towards me, she was in love with my father, because of him I exist and I felt terrible, I wanted to cry I wanted to just vanish, How can you do that to your father?

The first person I saw and she told me everything is fine do not worry I will keep you and our mother safe it was my sister. For years to follow till and today I am asking myself how my sister was so calm, so wise so rich of knowledge , she never went to a high school and I believe she only did 6 years at school then she start working, From where she got the knowledge to welcome me in her house, having 4 young children and she welcomes me when I told her I was HIV positive

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My good friend's mother uses to treat him very bad, in fact, I stop her couple of times and I made a point to her that she's a mother to him why she was behaving so bad!! My friend died at list 5 years earlier cause his mother never cook a fresh food for him, he didn't have any clothes to wear because she was all his clothes with bleach, once I went to take him out one afternoon for coffee and I felt so sorry for him that I bought him new Jeans and T-shirt, in order to go out for coffee

A mother to her child, those were the dark days I call them, every day someone we knew of was dying, the Gay scene in Athens was devastated and the Bars and clubs were empty, they were the Dark Days.

Then we had to face the priest as well by talking nonsense to our family , as God sent the virus to punish the homosexuals as if the virus itself was not enough for a punishment we had to face the church and the family and the general public cause if you 're well-known homosexual they use to ask you to leave the Bar

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The story of the virus started at 1920's in Zimbabwe but those days they didn't know why they were dying from high fever etc, the virus exist in the monkey and its a normal virus does no harm,



The story is long and interesting, the virus on monkey A lets call it it does no harm however when they fight and through blood the virus jumps to the new host call him B but because of different immune system and in order to survive it changes on the Host B say and from Virus become a virus A and as all virus are clever the HIV virus is even more clever, in that country they hunt to kill and eat a type of monkey where the meat is soft and very tasty, of course, some of our meat well done some raw and eating raw meat the virus find a host on the first human body

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Thousands died cause of that unknown virus and all had the symptoms as we know them the HIV virus has, but they are Africans and nobody pays any attention, I am sure the American Politicians were happy when the black population was minimized their numbers. It took 258 Deaths to make Reagan and take some action, He completely ignores the fact men were dying, They are Gay who cares.

So back to my routes and to my beloved sister. Sadly she is not with us anymore, she died of a heart attack in January 2010 , I was in prison those days and when I was out for the day I called my nephew because I was thinking about my sister going mad about my two year absence, When he told me, my sister was dead I felt and still do that the end of everything was here



I could not believe I will never ever see her face again, her smile her loud voice, everywhere she was going people have to notice her, she was always smiling, her heart was so big every house and every place was far too small to accommodate my sister's, heart.

Only last year I manage to visit her grave and I could not believe the woman I admire the most , the woman I loved the most more than I loved my mother she was lying there dead, I wanted to take her place , If someone deserves to live and be happy as this woman but once more God proved to me he's a wanker.

He supposes to love us and look after us and what is he doing, fucking nothing. I still believe deep inside my sister is right behind me, she's watching me and she knows I am doing well when I am happy I can feel her Happiness and when I am sad to try to hide somewhere because I do not want her to be sad as well

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She left behind a legacy, four fantastic children and they are all so beautiful to behave and every time I see them I keep seeing my sisters face, how proud she must have been off creating such a beautiful children.



Her husband is devastating, I 've been told from one of the kids that he tried to kill himself but the children sat him down and talk to him make him understand that they still need him around, and he's still around enjoying the equal beautiful grandchildren the kids giving him, and there in the living room in every corner there's a picture of my sister smiling as if she's sharing the happiness all around.

My life was not an easy one, It came with lots of troublesome I think I create it and some meant to happen I am one of those men where everywhere I go anything I do the trouble follows me, I can not help it, The same time I am grateful cause I am still alive after all I have done, and some still do.I am or was lucky to meet some great men and women which still admire and Love

Love I always put my friends first cause I think We do need them around we need to have friends and we need to share everything we have with others, nothing is ours we just spirit trapped in flesh and when we die we just go, the houses we bought or the cars are all left behind.

If you do not share your Life is it Life worth Living?

Mario Ilias Ro

Photos by Pixabay.com

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