A study found which colors make people recoil in horror. I have some thoughts as to why each of the colors bothers us.
A massive study recently found the ugliest color in the world.
Well, “recently” is a little generous. The study ran four years ago. It’s finally getting attention now because the winner was a “dark olive” color, which then became the standard packaging color for cigarettes in Australia and the U.K. But (for real here) Big Olive didn’t like that besmirching, and finally convinced those governments to start referring to the color by a different name. “Dark drab brown” won out.
But the Internet has rapidly twisted that to “poop brown,” obviously.
Anyway, as I dug deep into the results of the ugly color study, I found enough of the runners-up to “dark drab brown” to put together this list. These are the 11 ugliest colors in the world…
Dark drab brown
Unpleasant things it evokes: Feces, mud, getting pudding instead of a real dessert.
Unpleasant things it evokes: Discoloration, internal organs that may or may not be healthy, bad teeth, your coworker’s pants from Old Navy.
Unpleasant things it evokes: Mucus, infection, BP.
Unpleasant things it evokes: Pus, vomit, Pittsburgh sports teams.
Unpleasant things it evokes: Prison, emptiness, almost purely black but not quite enough so something feels just slightly off, Fifty Shades of Grey.
Unpleasant things it evokes: Ominously blank classroom walls, boringness, death, iPods that stopped working within a year.
Unpleasant things it evokes: Rust.
Unpleasant things it evokes: Infection, diarrhea, bad ’70s decor.
Unpleasant things it evokes: The really cheap Gilden t-shirts that never quite fit right.
Unpleasant things it evokes: The circumference around a pimple, flavorless fish, what it looks like if a fingernail gets ripped off.
Unpleasant things it evokes: Your eyes hurting, frozen yogurt with Nerds mixed in, a middle-aged female art teacher’s shawl.
A few years back I did a list of the 11 Worst Movie Posters of the ’80s. When I was recently researching my list about Ice Ice Baby I saw the poster for Vanilla Ice’s 1991 movie Cool as Ice — and I knew it was finally time for a follow-up.
So these are my picks for 11 of the worst movie posters of the 1990s. Let the catty nostalgia commence!
Cool as Ice (1991)
The design here is actually kind of cool-cheesy — so many colors! — but it’s everything surrounding the design that lands the poster on this list. (1) Vanilla Ice trying so hard to look cool while a “proper”-looking girl observes. (That haircut plus a periwinkle cardigan is the universal sign of a proper girl.) (2) The special mention that this is Vanilla’s “first motion picture.” (Ha.)
And finally, (3) the wildly convoluted tagline: “When a girl has a heart of stone, there’s only one way to melt it. Just add Ice.” Ice melts stone now? This is like the whole South Park debate melting someone’s icy heart with a hot/cool island song all over again.
Necessary Roughness (1991)
Takes a pretty cool football movie and makes it look like a total joke. How did they see this film and decide their best marketing angle would be a janky cartoon football with horns and sunglasses? If you didn’t think Scott Bakula was marketable — even though this movie came out right when Quantum Leap was in the middle of its run — at LEAST put Kathy Ireland in her uniform on there.
Exit to Eden (1994)
I bet there were at least 100 executives who took pixel-by-pixel looks at this poster to try to answer the burning question: “How much Dominatrix Rosie O’Donnell is too much?”
The Program (1993)
I put the DVD cover side-by-side with the theatrical poster to show how they eventually figured it out. The movie poster makes it look like this is Rudy-meets-School Ties-meets-the Saved by the Bell freeze-frame high five. The DVD cover lets you know you’re dealing with a gritty football movie that features badass rebels on motorcycles and a dirty football team that’s not-so-subtly based on Florida State. And that’s what we wanted to see.
Side Out (1990)
Yeah, it’s from 1990 so it’s almost an ’80s movie… but come on. This poster is at least six or seven years out of date. By the ’90s we weren’t burning people’s retinas with ungodly color schemes of hot pink, yellow and orange anymore. We wanted teal everything. (Beyond the colors and the “Side Out” font, C. Thomas Howell’s face also really helped get this onto the list. Who performs a fingers-interlocking high-five without even looking at the other person?)
Super Mario Bros. (1993)
So you’re turning the most popular video game of all time into a movie. Why NOT go with the tagline “This ain’t no game”?
Top Dog (1995)
Laughably bad Photoshop work on the disembodied dog here — by 1995, anyone could do better than this in Photoshop. Also, it’s really not clear to me between Chuck Norris and the dog wearing the police hat which one’s tough and which one’s smart. I mean… if Chuck Norris is the tough one making the dog the smart one, why does the dog look so goofy and have the hat on crooked?